Hildegard von Bingen (1098 – 1179), was not only the first to add hops to beer; she was also a medic, philosopher, composer, poet, adviser to the Pontif, Kings, and other dignitaries. She was one of the first to stick up for women’s rights and wrote the first literature regarding the female orgasm.

She was Nun of this, Nun of that, and Nun of the other.
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The oldest brewery still brewing is The Weihenstephan Abbey in Germany. It has been producing beer for almost 1000 years, and is still brewing beers right up to the present day, though it is no longer officially an abbey.

Brewing for 1000 years? That brew must be ready by now, surely!
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In brewery abbeys during the middle ages, fasting monks were allowed to drink five quarts of beer per day. That’s nearly 5 Litres!

Give us this day our liquid bread. 5-a-day. That many liquid toasts is one unholy hangover.
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Ancient Babylonians were so fastidious about maintaining good standards in beer quality, that any brewers producing naff beer were drowned in it.

Far too lenient.
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The first consumer protection law ever written was for beer. On 23rd April 1516, beer loving Duke Wilhelm IV of Bavaria set out a document of legislation called the Reinheitsgebot. It was a brewing purity law limiting the ingredients of beer to just barley, hops, yeast and water. It still exists today, around 500 years later, but sadly only in Bavaria.

The Duke would turn in his urn to see the synthetic flavourings, E-Numbers, and colourings used in some of the more dubious beers of modern times.
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Inca tribes women brew a form of beer called Chicha. It is made from corn, but instead of barley starches being converted into fermentable sugars using barley’s own alpha and beta amylase enzymes, Chicha uses the salivary amylase enzyme from, yes, salivar to break down those corn starches. The village women chew the corn and then SPIT it into the mash tun, their saliva helps to convert the corns starches into fermentable sugars.

Sounds delightful.
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The paid Egyptian pyramid workers were paid partly in beer. The beer was called “kash” and this is where the word “cash” originates.

What would you like Kash or Czech?
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Bass beers triangle logo was the worlds first trademark. A devoted Bass employee stayed all night outside the registrar’s office on New Years Eve 1876, just so that Bass would be first in the queue when the office opened in the morning. This famous logo can be seen in paintings by Manet and Picasso.

That beats TV advertising for panache.
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In America the Pilgrims were planning to go further south to warmer climates, but landed instead at Plymouth Rock because they ran out of beer.

I wonder who owned the liquor store.
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The American National Anthem, ‘The Star Spangled Banner’, was originally an old English drinking song from a famous London men’s club. It was previously called ‘To Anacreon In Heaven’ and the original words were a dedication to the ancient Greek bard that wrote songs and poetry celebrating booze, women and song.

I’ll drink to that. HIC!
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At any given time, an estimated 0.7% of the whole world is drunk.

I’ll drink to that! HIC!
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In medieval England, beer was served up along with breakfast.

I’ll HIC to that! Drink!
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George Washington owned his own brewery.

Is that The First Lady? No, its the thirst, lady.
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Olde world English drinkers would often bring their own beer tankards to the pub. Some had whistles in the handles so that, in rowdy bars, the drinker could get the attention of the bar staff. Hence the term for having a beer is “Wetting your whistle.”

I prefer drowning my whistle.
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In 1814, an exploding beer vat destroyed a brewery and two homes. 100,000 gallons of beer flooded the neighbouring London streets and several unfortunate people lost their lives.

Puts a whole new meaning to having a head on your beer.
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Guinness scientists state that a pint of beer is lifted about ten times, and each time about 0.56 ml is lost in the drinkers facial hair. In fact, Britain alone loses 92,749 litres of beer each year in moustaches and beards.

That is why I always wring my beard out before leaving my glass.
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Stella Artois used to simply be called ‘Artois’. It acquired the added ‘Stella’ (meaning Star) because that was the name of their popular Christmas beer.

They wished it could be Chrisrmas everyday. Going by there sales figures, it has been.
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The Scaffold’s hit song, ‘Lily The Pink’ was about the supposed effect of hallucinations from alcoholism (pink elephants). One of the songs vocalists was Sir Tim Rice, famous lyricist from Broadway to Disney.

Luckily, his one a only foray into singing. Don’t call us, we’ll call you.
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In 1948, the Luxembourg branch of Alcoholics Anonymous had only 2 members.

Something tells me there were other alcoholics about, but they were far from anonymous.
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The 1974 annual dinner and dance for the Belfast branch of Alcoholics Anonymous turned into a massive punch up after bar staff had served the recovering alcoholics nearly £400 worth of booze.

Anyone for punch?

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